Tri-City United v Classics
McLean Park
16th. Nov 2014

Conditions: Weather cold and ground very hard in parts

Players on duty: Jimmy Butler, Danny Jensen, Dave Moore, Pat Rohla, Alan Massender, Larry Thorlakson, Gordie Macklin, Gene Crowley, Daryl Lawrie, Alfie Deglan, Chris Arcari, Lorenzo Arcari, Warren Crowley, Pat O'Krane, Will Dixon.

Classics show heart......
This game had the kick-off time postponed to 12:00 as the ground was closed and frozen and could not be used safely at 10:00am. Danny Jensen had been working hard installing 2,000 sq. ft. of flooring the previous day so that he could make it to this match. He had heard that Jethro was unavailable for selection and brought along all his off-cuts, a hammer and nails, a huge tub of PVA glue and Cheryl's red and white spotted pinny - he always wears that for his jobs (like washing the dishes) around the house. His idea of boarding up the goals before the kick off was not appreciated by the stand in goalie. During the match warm-up the goalie instructed Danny not to pass tha ball back 'on goals' as the ground was very hard and bumpy to which Danny replied, "Don't worry, I never pass to you anyway!" The team really brims with camaraderie and has such confidence in each other! When the game got under way a midfield tussle ensued from the off. Both sides were putting everything into the game with the Classics having the better of the half-chances. The first goal was manufactured from a brilliant piece of interplay which ended with Willie Dixon in the box with the ball glued to his feet. He unselfishly squared the ball to Pat O'Krane who hammered the ball home with finesse and a plum (that's what Jim Eden said anyway).

Jimmy Butler was fighting one of his demons. Strikers have an insatiable hunger for goals. They feed off the buzz. When the goals dry up, a striker's confidence nose dives, along with his form. Butler was going through a goal drought and, although his teammates were being as supportive as possible, the lack of goals was weighing heavily on his shoulders. He was not rippling the back of the net, how could he lift himself out of the doldrums? Such was his appetite for scoring that he secretly employed, at great expense, Jean Piaget, an eminent sports psychologist (another name for a psychiatrist) who asked the goal-starved hitman to look at the bigger picture. Piaget told him, "I've had lots of experience with these matters. Try kicking the ball between those big white posts. Dick Howard told me this once and it's the best advice I can offer." Well Butler did try to put the advice into practise. He was put through midway in the first half and he successfully rounded the keeper and blasted the ball between those big white posts. Something went wrong though as a United defender appeared out of a trap door in the ground, to a big puff of white smoke, and chested the ball away to safety - it was a tremendous save. Minutes later the magic moment happened. Chris Arcari drilled the ball through the eye of a needle to Gordie Macklin who relayed the ball to Butler who finished in style - the drought was over. Butler described the relief as 'orgasmic' which is another way of describing food that has been produced without pesticides - I don't get it! United did pull a goal back when the Classics defence parted like the Red Sea and left an attacker the simple job of slipping the ball to the left of the keeper and into the net, almost off the upright. I wouldn't blame Larry Thorlakson for the fault although the rest of the defence did. The first half seemed to go on for ever, I'm sure it was as long as the field!

The second half had a distinct lack of incidents but Pat Rohla managed to get himself sent to the sin-bin after telling the referee what to do with his whistle. His appearance must rank as one of the shortest ever appearances by a substitute - it like he was tied to an elastic! Another incident involved Warren Crowley who blasted the ball high over the bar when it looked easier to score although some of his colleagues described the blast as more of as chip with a pitching wedge. On the whole, it was a very satisfactory result against good opposition. The next question of course is, "Now that Butler has passed the drought baton to Macklin, when will he score again?" He has failed to find the net since 2nd. November.

Final Score: Tri-City United 1 v Classics 2 (1-2)

GK: D. Moore
Sin Bin: P. Rohla
Crap Award: P. Rohla