Classics v Britannia
James Hill
21st. Jan. 2018

Conditions: Exceptionally windy

Players on duty: Jason Clegg, Jeff Dickson, Jimmy Butler, Randy Hosler, Dave Moore, Alan Massender, Larry Thorlakson, Gordie Macklin, David Breen, Gene Crowley, Daryl Lawrie, Chuck McGill, Chris Arcari, Lorenzo Arcari, Alfie Deglan, Willie Dixon.
Coaches on duty: Chuck McGill & Willie Dixon.

Normal service is resumed........
The roads to the ground were strewn with the debris of a very powerful overnight game which made the journey resemble a dodgem track. With the commentator making a rare start in the game the dictaphone was passed to Jim Eden who began his apprenticeship in commentating. When asked if he had ever used a dictaphone he was heard to reply, "I usually use my finger!" This brought the usual titter from the lads. A ball was played from the left in the tenth minute by Jimmy Butler and it rebounded nicely for Daryl Lawrie who tucked the ball home. Two minutes later a left sided run by Gordie Macklin was moved on to Butler who crossed for Lawrie who was again on hand to side-foot the ball home to the right of the visiting keeper. On the 17th a ball on the right was picked up by Alfie Deglan, making his second come-back, who rifled the ball home into the top right-hand corner for 3-0.

The 20th minute brought a golden (or is that goalden) opportunity for Lawrie to complete his hat-trick but he put the ball tamely wide. This move is becoming known as the wallet syndrome! Goal number four arrived in the 35th minute, courtesy of Chuck McGill. It came from a flowing move on the left which involved Willie Dixon and Alan Massender, found McGill lurking at the far post who headed the ball home with style. Britannia posed a real threat in the 40th minute after a far post cross was headed back goalwards. The ball looked to be going in until another forward headed the ball over the crossbar. The score was 4-0 at the half.

The start of the second half was given the kiss of doom from Delgan who said, "At least it's not raining," whereupon it started to rain. Butler made an early run down the right and crossed for Delgan who chipped the ball forwards but the keeper was on hand to collect it before any further damage could be done. The 52nd minute saw another right wing forage by Jeff Dickson and Deglan and the ball fell to Butler who had the simple task of rolling the ball home. Butler had another chance in the 60th when he was put through one-on-one with the keeper. What should have been bread and butter for him turned out to be toast and dripping as he put the ball hopelessly wide to the left. Dickson had a terrinbe miss two minutes later when it looked easier to score - all he had to do was put it in but he put it wide! It wasn't Dickson's day as he fluffed another easy chance just two minutes later by tapping the ball instead of hitting it. Randy Hosler took two successive corners in the 65th minute and the second one was aimed at the penalty spot where Massender had asked for it and he made it count as he looped a header for goal number six. With four minutes remaining the final nail went into the coffin and it was a scrappy goal. However, it was Lawrie who put it home to the left of the keeper to claim his first ever hat-trick for the club. He also showed his generosity at the conclusion of the game.

After match discussion centred around the legaility of a goal when both coaches are simultaneously on the field.

Final Score: Classics 7 Britannia 0 (4-0)

MWG: Daryl Lawrie
Hat Trick: Daryl Lawrie
Crap Award: Gene Crowley