Classics v AKAL
James Hill Park
4th. Dec. 2016

Conditions: Sunny but very cold

Players on duty: Judd Boxtart, Pat Rohla, Alan Massender, Larry Thorlakson, Gordie Macklin, David Breen, Gene Crowley, Chuck McGill, Chris Arcari, Lorenzo Arcari, Randy Hosler, Bryan Griffiths, Sherman Foster, Warren Crowley, Gino Nonni, Willie Dixon, Jody Nelson.

Revenge achieved........
The Classics entertained AKAL in a switched match. The fixture was called off at Newton Athletic due to an unplayable field so the home team travelled to James Hill. AKAL had inflicted the only defeat of the season on the Classics in the opening match so vengeance was the order of the day. It was a cagey start with both teams looking for dominance in the early stages. The seventh minute brought the opening goal. With Judd Boxtart holding the ball Gordie Macklin called for a long ball on the left wing which he got. The huge bounce deceived the AKAL defender and Macklin set off on a great individual run from just inside the visitors half. He advanced into the penalty box where he cleverly chipped the keeper to watch his effort nestle into the far corner of the goal. It was a well taken goal with a great assist from the keeper - for once it came from Macklin's first shot! The game got a little chirpy midway through the half and Chuck McGill was given a 10 minute sin-bin for an altercation with a opposing player. Jody Nelson made his debut and was on the receiving end of a yellow card after a few minutes on the field. Gino Nonni was looking to beat Rick Geary's shortest appearance record and he almost made it but he had a couple of touches before he had to retire from the game through injury. He took it very well and so did the surrounding fence of the field.

AKAL dominated a lot of the second half and took advantage of some of the holes in midfield but the defence were in no mood to succumb to an over-aggressive display from the visitors; they were restricted to long range efforts which either went wide or over and those on target were handled competently by Boxtart. Alan Massender was again jinxed through injury and had to leave the field midway through the second half, not to return. Moments later a complete moment of comedy occurred as Boxtart suffered an early bout of dementure and forgot who his defenders were. He held the ball in both hands and demurely rolled the ball out to an attacking player who was standing three yards off the goalline. The surprised player said, "Thank you very much," and hammered the ball powerfully towards the goal. Thankfully it was straight at Boxtart so he was able to save his own blushes by making a reflex save. With minutes remaining it should have been 2-0 to the Classics but Sherman Foster missed a goalline header by heading the ball past the goal post. However, time was played out with Pat Rohla doing his bit with a little gamesmanship which annoyed one of the AKAL players, who insisted that a free kick had to be taked another 30 millimetres back. Jim Eden even got in on the act and made an appearance from the side line with a jinking run with the ball. Rohla made up for it when play resumed by winding the number 11 up like a corkscrew. The final score of 1-0 was well justified as the best team won.

It was all witnessed by a capacity gate with standing room only. Some of the fans had to stand outside the fencing due to the capacity on the line. There was the usual Crowley contingent with Eron, Kara and Luke, who always sound like an jingle advert for ; Margaret Gallagher; Heidi Rohla; Tiare Nonni; even Patti Arcari made her first appearance in about five seasons; Jody also had a large following who were holding plackards with the 'Jody Nelson' fan club emblazoned upon them; there were also two dogs and a stroller as well as a man walking past with an umberella and a limp whom nobody knew.

After match conversation centred around the mystery disappearance of Sherman. Was he abducted by aliens? Is he in hiding with Howard Hughes? Did he disappear into the Murrayvill triangle? Is he looking for Amelia Earhart? Well the anomaly can be cleared up as he was snapped (see picture) at Denny Ross field, practising his heading techniques with the team after their game. Another question to be answered is why did Randy Hosler play most of the second half with a ladies sanitary product sticking out of his nose - or had a mouse crawled up there? These mysteries will continue to haunt us for years to come.

Final Score: Classics 1 AKAL 0 (1-0)

MWG: Gordie Macklin
Sin Bin: Chuck McGill
Yellow Card: Jody Nelson
You were crap award: Judd Boxtart